Just a Vent About Facebook

What is Facebook....really??

When I think about what Facebook really is, I picture entering a building where your friends, family, and strangers all have their own auditoriums. You can identify them because their names and pictures are on the doors.

Sometimes, you find yourself in front of a particular set of doors because you received an invite from this person. Usually because you are related, work with, in the same circle, or maybe just because they thought you might be interesting to know.

Other times, you knock, and wait to see if you gain admittance to this particular space. Knowing that, even if you are family, co workers, or just new acquaintances, you may or may not be allowed to enter.

Once you are able to walk thru those doors, you can see that they have made that space their own. You see that the walls are painted their favorite color, the chairs & tables are all of their own design, there are pictures of them having a great time at life! It is a great feeling to know that someone welcomed you into their little world they created just to share their life with you & everyone else that they have now deemed "friends".

But are you really?? Are you really FRIENDS?? Are you really WELCOMED?? And exactly how much of YOU are they actually welcoming in??

I believe there should be some sort of Terms & Conditions form you must sign BEFORE walking thru those doors into someone else's auditorium. One that let's you know what they expect of YOU as a member on their friends list. To let you know if they really do accept ALL of you...or they just want your "LIKES" or "thumbs ups". People to ONLY agree with what they say, and laugh along with them...sometimes at someone else's expense, even when they don't see it...although you don't agree with them. It would be nice to know before entering if someone is really NOT interested in to getting to know the REAL you, which comes with your own beliefs, opinions & experiences. It would most definitely save some heartaches, am I right!?!?

Not too long ago, I was visiting one of these auditoriums that I have been welcomed in for a long time. On this particular visit, I came across something that was hanging on the wall that was suppose to bring a giggle to those passing by. Now, in my experience, I have seen many others balk at this "joke", but for MYSELF, I do find some truths in it. I do not usually open up about this sort of thing, especially on social media, but I thought, since this was a long time friend, that I could.

I was wrong. I shared my own experiences and feelings on the topic, also sharing that it's not always so black & white, that I believe there are some good things to be learned & applied if in the right situation. I was not insulted nor offended of what they put on their wall...it is THEIR wall after all...just sharing my own knowledge on the topic.

The words that I wrote, which I in no way was meaning to, obviously hit a nerve with them. I decided to pull them to the side, to have a personal conversation with just them, to apologize if I had hurt them in anyway and that it was NOT my intention to do so. Which they responded with something like, "Just like with the rest of the world, I do not have time to think about everyone's feelings when putting things on my wall." And then went on to basically say, "....when visiting my auditorium, you need to just sit down, keep your opinions to yourself {if you do not 100% agree with me}, and if you can not do that, you are free to leave & take yourself off of the list of who are welcomed here."

So what did I do?? I shed tears. Loss is hard. Especially when you have believed for so long that another human being was your friend. I gathered my things, and I proudly walked out of that auditorium not looking back.

I think it is tough when you lose something that you have JUST discovered wasn't really there the whole time. I have friends now who value MY opinion...{as I value THEIRS}...even if it doesn't align up with theirs. And it is OK for us to have a difference of opinion on things. I learn from hearing their side, and, I hope, they also learn from hearing mine. At the end of the day, no matter what, we have a TRUE friendship connection. It is not broken by something as petty as differing opinions. There is a love there that is stronger than that.

Because I know what a TRUE friendship is, it really wasn't that hard to walk away from what was reveled as nothing more than artificial friendship. It was clear that there was no care for me in the words that they threw at me. Which was very sad, but very eye opening...that tends to usually be what happens when someone shows their true colors.

Does this mean I think people shouldn't post what they want on their own personal Facebook?? I think people should feel absolutely free to post whatever they want on their Facebook walls. I have NO qualms about what others do in their personal space. But, please....if you WELCOME others into that space...don't shoot them down when they try and share their experiences with you. Listen to them...you did accept them as your "friend" after all. Friends listen to each other, and are there for each other....they learn from one another....you can see things from a whole other perspective if you are willing!

Thanks for listening! Sometimes it is really good to get things off of your heart, and release them out into the world.

Only love & light,

Jenn